Our goals are not simply words like money, happiness, or success, but are stories fully experienced through our senses that define our relationship with that concept and the world. When we set a goal, we activate an entire framework through which we see the world that includes all our beliefs and expectations about that goal and how it relates to ourselves.
Furthermore, the brain helps us to quickly make sense of the world by ignoring what we don’t expect (check out the second episode of Brain Games on Netflix) and has a difficult time recognizing something that is not consistent with our own stories. For example, if my story is that success is something other people have, I could be queen and not be able to recognize that as success.
So instead of setting goals, we should be seeing goals. We need to examine our own neurological framework that we have created around our wishes – what connections, assumptions, sensations, and beliefs does thinking of the goal bring up? Once we dissolve these stories about ourselves that are no longer useful, these inaccurate connections, we can recognize the opportunities and the gifts in front of us.